My M.E (chronic fatigue -Myalgic Encephalomyelitis) seems to have really caught up with me now.
The further I move away from it mentally, the nearer it sneaks up behind me physically.
I am doing so much mentally and having great fun thinking up new idea's and seeing old idea's come to fruition...but all the time, I cannot shake off this exhaustion. I look back and realise how little I can do compared with a year ago....and this week I looked back to just the last couple of months and see how far downhill I have gone.
I took delivery of a powered wheelchair last week and this week was assessed as needing a wet room and a stair lift..... I am only 50!
It is strange. I am so pleased to have the independence that the mobility wheelchair will give me BUT it defines me now as 'disabled' and I feel really sad, like I have gone backwards.
All I can do to stay sane, is be positive. The joy I felt when being outside in the sunshine this week, in my wheelchair, was wonderful...it really did fill my soul. That pleasure will be worth putting up with all the negatives. I have been so isolated for so long, stuck indoors because the effort of getting ready to go out was too much, let alone the actual trip out!
I saw last summer mainly through my bedroom window. This year I plan to take the dog for a walk with my husband, visit the beach and stroll (or rather ride) along the quay. I plan to start living again.
You coming too? You will recognise me when you see me.......I'll be gliding along, the gal with a smile on her face, wearing red button boots!!!!!
The further I move away from it mentally, the nearer it sneaks up behind me physically.
I am doing so much mentally and having great fun thinking up new idea's and seeing old idea's come to fruition...but all the time, I cannot shake off this exhaustion. I look back and realise how little I can do compared with a year ago....and this week I looked back to just the last couple of months and see how far downhill I have gone.
I took delivery of a powered wheelchair last week and this week was assessed as needing a wet room and a stair lift..... I am only 50!
It is strange. I am so pleased to have the independence that the mobility wheelchair will give me BUT it defines me now as 'disabled' and I feel really sad, like I have gone backwards.
All I can do to stay sane, is be positive. The joy I felt when being outside in the sunshine this week, in my wheelchair, was wonderful...it really did fill my soul. That pleasure will be worth putting up with all the negatives. I have been so isolated for so long, stuck indoors because the effort of getting ready to go out was too much, let alone the actual trip out!
I saw last summer mainly through my bedroom window. This year I plan to take the dog for a walk with my husband, visit the beach and stroll (or rather ride) along the quay. I plan to start living again.
You coming too? You will recognise me when you see me.......I'll be gliding along, the gal with a smile on her face, wearing red button boots!!!!!
